Taking the Minnie

I have recently returned from a holiday in Orlando, Florida. As is the custom for Orlando visitors, I was forced to go to Disney World. The main part of Disney World is called the Magic Kingdom. This is where the big gay castle is and where the old school Disney characters like Goofy, Pluto and Donald Duck hang out. There are also a few hundred other characters marauding the streets bursting out into song in order to piss adults off even more than they already are. Kids fucking love it, because kids are stupid.

Now the head of all the Disney characters is Mickey Mouse. He leads the parades. He gets the best lines in the songs. He's always front and centre on the main stage.

Next to him in all the songs is Minnie Mouse.

If you ignore the Hitler salute, do you see a difference between these two characters? Minnie has three eyelashes above each eye. There are no other differences. She doesn't even have tits. It's difficult to tell in two dimensional drawings, but while at the Magic Kingdom I confirmed this.

So Mickey and Minnie are the so called head of the Disney family. The mother and father if you like, but interestingly enough Mickey and Minnie aren't married. This is according to Walt Disney himself. But wait you say, because you talk out loud while reading blogs. If they're not married, why do they have the same surname?

This brings us back to them looking identical to each other except for the fake eyelashes. Yes, those eyelashes are not real! I can prove this by telling you that they're drawings. I rest my case.

So if Mickey and Minnie look identical and they have the same surname, what does this mean? Yes, they're related. Minnie is probably a man. And they're both into animal love. These are the role models of American children.

So if you have young impressionable children, why don't you take them to Disney World and let them worship mutant incestuous gay beastiality loving freaks, who get the police involved when a mild mannered tourist touches Minnie's chest.

It's a sick world!