Thursday, 9 June 2011

Is there a Dawkins?

I have recently read The God Delusion, which is also known as the atheist's bible.

The God Delusion tries to persuade the reader that there is no God, because some very intelligent scientists from Charles Darwin to Albert Einstein say so. To understand the science behind their theories, one needs to have several degrees in education and big thinkingness. So basically the average person will not really understand the science behind the God Delusion, but must just have faith in the words.

A theory about the universe:
... it postulates a vast and rapidly growing number of universes, existing in parallel and mutually undetectable except through the narrow porthole of quantum-mechanical experiments.


Quoting from Steve Grand:
Think of an experience from your childhood. Something you remember clearly, something you can see, feel, maybe even smell, as if you were really there. After all, you really were there at the time, weren't you? How else would you remember it? But here is the bombshell: you weren't there. Not a single atom that is in your body today was there when that event took place. Matter flows from place to place and momentarily comes together to be you.


Another way in which the reader is persuaded that there is no God is by looking at certain texts from the Bible and Koran, which comes across as ridiculous, but I guess some people just have faith in the words.

Looking at the book of Paul:
Adam, the supposed perpetrator of the original sin, never existed in the first place: an awkward fact - excusably unknown to Paul but presumable known to an omniscient God (and Jesus, if you believe he was God?) - which fundamentally undermines the premise of the whole tortuously nasty theory. Oh, but of course, the story of Adam and Eve was only ever symbolic, wasn't it? Symbolic? So, in order to impress himself, Jesus had himself tortured and executed, in vicarious punishment for a symbolic sin committed by a non-existent individual?


Although the claimed author of the book, Richard Dawkins, does have his own input into the book, most of the book is made up of quotes from famous scientists, philosophers and theologians.

Some of Dawkins' own quotes include:
Eukaryotic Cells


No such thing. There are such things Eucaryotic Cells, but it looks like Dawkins is making up words now.


Memeplexes


A meme is a word made up by Dawkins which is about an idea or behaviour being passed on from person to person within a culture. The plexes bit he just added on, so that he can claim to have thought of another new word.

So now we have proof that he's just making up things in this book.



Doctor Dawkins explains how doctors think:
We doctors call that kind of linkage linkage.



So why should we believe the God Delusion? Who created the God Delusion? Apparently it was somebody called Richard Dawkins. But surely the main question we should be asking is who created Richard Dawkins? Is he real? Have you ever met Richard Dawkins? Do you know of anybody who has met Richard Dawkins? You possibly have a friend who knows somebody who says they know somebody who once went to a lecture of his. Do we just take their word for it? But so many of us have see Richard Dawkins on TV. Yes, but I've also seen Jesus on TV. Who am I to believe?

Who could have come up with all these thoughts, quotes and ideas put them all together and sell them as thought provoking philosophy? Who would be so pissed off with God that they spend most of their life looking at the universe in order to create some kind of doubt about His existence. I think the clue is in the name "Dawkins", whose name is part derived from Charles Darwin and...

























Dick.

Wednesday, 8 June 2011

Don't go near the light

I recently picked up a cold and as I'm a man, this means I'm near death. The following email conversation took place between myself and my loving wife:

Wife: Are you dying?
Sad Muppet: I’m currently only just hanging on. If I don’t make it, I want you to be brave. I want you to move on with your life. I want you to start dating other men again, no matter how hard it will be for you. I want you to try. Even though none of them will ever measure up to me, I want you to find mild happiness again.
W: Just men? Is that a rule? I need to be sure.
SM: Men, women, goats… whatever brings you mild happiness.
W: What if I like the man/woman/goat more than you and become ecstatically happy?
SM: Can the goat mow the lawn? Can the goat pop to the shop to get you some milk or cheese? Can the goat head-butt young children who annoy you?
W: Hmmm… You have given me a lot to think about. *Goes to goats dating wesite*
Attractive 31-year-old with a GSOH seeks goat with similar for fun, friendship, lawn-mowing and head-butting small children. Nanny goats need not apply.

SM: I’m not dead yet!
W: Doesn’t hurt to be prepared. You wanted me to move on quickly after your death; I can do this most effectively by having a few “back ups” ready to go. Makes sense, doesn’t it?
SM: I didn’t say quickly! You can date again after 6 months.
W: Six months from now or six months from when you snuff it?
SM: From when cross over.
W: Do you have an ETA on that? I am keen to get ahead of the game on this one.
SM: I’m feeling a bit better than I was feeling this morning, so with a bit of luck and the support of my wife by my side, I think I can beat this thing!
W: If it’s easier, you should just give in. Don’t struggle to get better on my behalf.
SM: I’m starting to doubt the support I’m getting from my wife.
W: Does that mean you’re less likely to survive?
SM: Yes!
W: Cool. Oh, by the way, if I die, I don’t want you to be happy and I don’t want you to move on. I want you to create a shrine to me in our bedroom. I would like one entire wall of the bedroom covered in photos of me (good photos, naturally), and a candle kept burning at all times. In every room of the house, I would like a massive picture of me and the words underneath “No-one can replace her. So don’t even think about it”. The Cat must wear black. And never let another girl set foot in the house. Even if she’s just there to read the meter.


She loves me so much, she can't bear the thought of me with another goat. I'm a lucky man.